Second
by AGENT Kuma-chan
Summary: Sasuke is always second. Second born, second best, second strongest. He always has to strive to be more like Itachi, to be just as smart and powerful and amazing. Even when he is older, nothing has really changed. He still is second.


_People continuously strive to be what they can't…_

Second

_i._

Itachi is perfect. He is the best ninja in their clan, perhaps even the best in the village besides the Hokage and a few other select ninja. Either way, he is strong. Someone that people can rely on. Someone people can look up to. He can do impossible, beat ninja more experienced than him in the blink of an eye. He is able to solve the most difficult problems, outsmarting his sensei and outthinking his opponents. He is a genius, gifted with power and skill. He is the product of his clan, a product that they show off and are proud of. He is something that the youngest dream to be, fellow ninja are envious of, and the one that the eldest envision as their successor.

His little brother, Sasuke, can't compare to him at all. He is weaker than him, filled with emotions of envy and joy and innocence, something that he shouldn't have because he is an Uchiha. Sasuke also is unable to control his birthright yet, when his brother had already graduated at his age. There are so many things that Sasuke can't do. He can't solve problems as quickly and as easily as Itachi does, for he has to think for a while and sometimes can't find the solution. He also has train hard, mostly by himself for he has no one to help him. Even then, even though he spends most of his time trying to improve, he still isn't anywhere near Itachi's level. People do rely on Sasuke, but that is mostly to become as good as Itachi. They don't look at Sasuke and see Sasuke. Instead they see a future Itachi.

Even though he is often overlooked, Sasuke still wants to be more like his brother. For then he might be recognized, seen as a person that is different and not Itachi. Maybe if he was more powerful, his father would look at him and not through him. And his brother isn't that bad of a person, helping him sometimes. His brother is kind and patient, filled with wisdom. His brother is everything Sasuke has to be, needs to be.

**So Sasuke tries his best to be someone he isn't. **

_ii. _

After the massacre, Itachi's image shattered a little. He was not kind or merciful, for he killed his family. He slaughtered his younger, vulnerable cousins, the little ones that couldn't fight and were excited that he came to visit. He destroyed homes that used to hold warm families, places that they used to go sometimes for dinner. He killed those who dreamed to be like him, training hard to make him proud. He mutilated those who were jealous of him, too weak to try harder and too ashamed to hate him. He carved his knife in the ones who thought that he was their clan's future, that he was the promise of what could be and would make their clan better.

Most importantly, he ruthlessly murdered his parents. His mother, who used to make him breakfast, forcing him to eat so he would have energy; who would clean his clothes and room, clucking her tongue when she saw how messy it had become. His father who would train him in the ways of their clan, putting all of his hopes and dreams in his eldest son. All of the love and guidance they poured into him, all of the smiles and affectionate pats they gave him, all for naught. Even though they gave him so much, he still killed them, not flinching when their blood sprayed him, not wincing when he heard his mother's scream or his father's groan. He didn't blink when he watched them slowly die.

He did something unforgivable. And for that, Sasuke doesn't think of him as family. He stops thinking of him as the elder brother who was warm and caring, an idol. He instead starts to think of him as an evil demon, one that will haunt him in his dreams for years to come. One that he has to kill for his clan, for his family, for _himself_.

However, even though he did all of that, Itachi's image isn't completely destroyed. He still is perfect. He still is powerful and strong, for he destroyed many agile and capable ninja. He is still intelligent, for he managed to make sure none of the clan escaped. And he still is skillful, for he didn't get wounded during the massacre.

Sasuke still looks up to him, though not in the same way as before. Now he looks at Itachi as if he is a goal post, someone to overcome at any cost. For Sasuke is still weaker, running away and sobbing instead of trying to fight.

**Sasuke still tries to be more like Itachi, though now it is to beat him. **

_iii._

Finally, after years of training Sasuke had killed Itachi. He grew stronger than he thought possible, able to run faster and have a longer endurance. Sasuke's chakra reserves are bigger now as well, allowing him to use chidori several times and manipulate it as he wishes. He also matured, body and mind, over the years. He is no longer the little boy he was, scared and running, fearful for his life. Now he can rein his emotions, fighting with a calm and controlled mind.

When he started to fight Itachi, Sasuke thought he was ready. Thought that it would be easy for him to defeat the murderer. He assumed that he had grown stronger than Itachi and could crush him whenever he wanted. He thought that he had _finally become the impossible_, become the strong, invincible, god that Itachi was.

And maybe he is right to think that he is stronger than Itachi. He killed him, after all.

However…Itachi still fought gracefully, dancing circles around Sasuke. He still managed to corner and trick Sasuke, closing his little brother into an unforeseen trap. Itachi was able to cut and hurt him, escaping at last minute when Sasuke tried to attack him. Itachi still was an amazing ninja, flying in and out of Sasuke's range without warning.

Sasuke might have beaten Itachi, but it still feels like he didn't. He still feels like that little kid staring at his brother, watching him intimidate others with his strength. He still feels like the little brother of a powerful figure, the person that everyone expects Sasuke to become. He still feels incompetent and weak, for Itachi managed to still show him the divine power of a god.

And when his brother died, he had a smile on his face. He still managed to defeat Sasuke, looking happy when he died. Almost like he let himself die.

And that makes Sasuke feel even worse, for he might not have defeated the god. He might have just been used by the god for the purpose of destroying him.

**Sasuke still feels like he can't compare to Itachi.**

_Itachi was perfect. Everything Sasuke wants to be, but isn't. Everything he strives to become but can't. Even in the end, Sasuke can't cross the distance between them, reach the status that Itachi achieved. _

_Sasuke is still second best…still unable to measure-up…still powerless…_

…

…

…

…

…

…

**A/N: **…..Was that good? I don't know…I think it could have worked out better….I'm pretty sure that there were some parts that didn't give off the feeling I wanted it to have. And I'm sure some parts were just downright bad.

…

…sigh…

At least this time it ended up properly! I was writing this before but it then became some sort of an Itachi story…(I saved and posted that too, but it wasn't what I was planning so I wrote this too)


End file.
